Sunday, November 29, 2009

A Question About Lesbians, and their Partners?

Now i know this **doesn't apply to everyone**, and i respect that.. however, why is it that when i see women gay couples that i usually notice one looks particularly more "guy'ish" ....When i say "guy'ish" i mean that while their partner looks beautifully feminine with the usual clothing (skirt,dress, etc) with long beautiful hair... they however are wearing baggy, jeans, a t-shirt, and has "short" (if not shaven) hair. Why does one adopt to more male looks.. is that a trend that they usually have b4 or after they get into a relationship?



THIS IS A QUESTION OFF OBSERVATION... i mean no disrespect in any way =)



A Question About Lesbians, and their Partners?

It's a stereotype...and can be true in many situtions....I know with my gay guy friends the tops are usually more masculine than the bottoms..so I could ask you the same question. Both my partner and I are very feminine and not butch at all...



A Question About Lesbians, and their Partners?

hey..i like how you asked this in the nicest way possible haha..anyway well theres different type of lesbians, the one with the more male look is called "butch" and its not cause its before or after they get into a relationship



A Question About Lesbians, and their Partners?

I guess some, not all, lesbians who are the butchier ones, do this so they will be more accepted in public. If you look at the masculine woman out of the relationship, and don't know that she is a woman, you would think she is a guy. I know some of my mates that do this because their partner is not 'out' in public, so they would rather hold the hand of a woman who is mistaken for a man than a woman who looks like a woman.



Neither my partner nor I are masculine looking. I look a lot meaner because of my job, and I also have several tattoos, but neither of us have short hair or dress the role of a masculine lesbian.



You have to remember, its all about preference.. some women prefer the masculine type of woman who can offer her protection and make her feel safe in the relationship... and on the other hand, some women like the softness of a femme partner, who they can share make over sessions and make up with...



I like my girl just the way she is... not femme, nor masculine.. in the middle.. she's more of the "sporty Spice"!!! haha



A Question About Lesbians, and their Partners?

Well I think the main problem with your observation is what you can and can't see. When you see a feminine woman with a butch woman, you kinda presume they are a lesbian couple. But if you just see two feminine girls together you probably just think they are friends or sisters, rather than a couple :)



Me and my partner are both femine, and we rarely hold hands in public or anything like that, so when we are out shopping or something I act around her no different than I do around any of my girl friends.



A Question About Lesbians, and their Partners?

That's a stereotype. You just don't notice when to feminine lesbians who are dating each other are walking around together. My girlfriend and I are both lesbians, and we are both very feminine. No one assumes we're lesbians though, so they never really "see" us. You only see the couples that have one butch partner and one feminine. That sort of way of expressing themselves is purely up to them, and could be for any and many reasons. I like to be feminine, so I dress feminine and I am feminine. So does my girlfriend. We are attracted to each other. There are so many different types of lesbians - what you just talked about is only one type of lesbian couple.



A Question About Lesbians, and their Partners?

OMG!! Neither me nor my wife look like men... !!! Is that a problem for you?? Does it F up your stereotype in any way? We are both very feminine, and you wouldn't think that we're lesbian unless I snog her in the street.



A Question About Lesbians, and their Partners?

this is just another stereotype, i on one hand am "femme" i have long hair, and i'm constantly making sure my eyebrows, and facial hair ie. chin etc. are "perfect", ilike to wear stretch jeans, and a nice blouse, however i dress differently when its time to mow the lawn, or play in the garden, or do outdoor things etc.(shorts, and a white tanktop), i suppose i prefer the "soft-butch" type(only cuz i've dated more of them), though i have dated all "types", my partner has long hair, but instead of wearing womens jeans she wears mens, and even shirts, she likes the way they fit her body-type better, but they are not baggy. she has hair growth issues i.e. bushier eyebrows etc.all her sisters(strait) have this issue too. but they all try thier best to keep up w/it including my partner , but this runs in her family, none of these make her "guyish", Everybody has thier own preference but the BEST WAY TO BASE ANY PRFERENCE IS NOT STEREOTYPE, BUT WHO YOU LOVE!!!



A Question About Lesbians, and their Partners?

That does happen sometimes. Each of them looked the way they look now before they even had met. Each person has their own style. There are some very butch lesbian, and there are some very feminine lesbians. Most do fall somewhere along the middle line though. In that case, the butchier of the pair was attracted to very feminine women, and vice versa, so the pair works.



I've always prefered my women looking a little on the soft butch side, meaning I do like a shorter haircut on them, with a strong personality, and maybe a little "boyish" to try and describe. My wife dresses well and professional, looks fantastic in makeup, played softball (yes, some lesbian DO play softball, even if it is a stereotype), but also enjoys just hanging out in jeans, t shirts, and sneakers. I'm more femme myself, but not in the way that most picture. I have longer hair, but I never wear makeup unless i'm going out (not condusive to my job as a dog groomer), I like to dress a little more girly on the right occations, but like my wife, I usually hang out in jeans and t shirts. So for the most part, we look fairly the same, and this dynamic works for us. People don't take roles after they're in a relationship, they just happen to be a certain style, and thats the style the other person is attracted to.



Hetero people usually tend to try to catagorize and define roles in gay and lesbian relationships because thats how their relationships are, and thats all they have to compare to. But gay and lesbian relationships are much more fluid, and there are no roles to fill.



A Question About Lesbians, and their Partners?

I am especially feminine with long blonde hair and blue eyes, but so is my girlfriend - she's a long-haired brunette and even though I'm not shallow, I do prefer more feminine women like myself. I know what you mean though - I know loads of lesbians who date their complete female opposites. Can't understand it either!

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